Crab Hole

The Perfect Description

2010-12-08T23:36:00.002+08:00

My fave couple in Soshi: TaeNy.

I found the most perfect description about how you feel when you fall in love with someone. In a fanfic. How awkwardly beautiful.

It's from a YoonYul fanfic called "The Upward Fall". Such beautiful and wonderful phrases. To those who despise and think that fanfics are just people who imagine their idols as couples, I'm sorry, that is the beauty of a fanfic.

Here's the best description ever:

"You've been in love before, right?" she asks me candidly. Of course, I tell her. "Then you know what it's like when you first meet them. You're a mess because your brain and your mouth refuse to cooperate and the person you thought you were is nothing like the person they're changing you into. No one makes you feel as weak and vulnerable as they do and you once thought it'd be the worst possible feeling in the world but instead, it turns out to be the best."

"I watch her speak and become struck with an odd feeling of jealousy. Her description is nothing like anything I have ever experienced and I find myself doubting if I truly have ever loved.

"But that's supposed to pass," she continues. "You're supposed to get over it after a while and get back to normal. I haven't though. I'm still falling for her and I don't know when I'll stop."

"Maybe you're falling upwards, then," I suggest jokingly.

"But she doesn't find it as humorous and nods her head understandingly.

"Maybe."

I just loved that whole description about falling in love with someone for the very first time.

"You're a mess because your brain and your mouth refuse to cooperate and the person you thought you were is nothing like the person they're changing you into. No one makes you feel as weak and vulnerable as they do and you once thought it'd be the worst possible feeling in the world but instead, it turns out to be the best."

How do you top that? How do you? Although I have no experience in love or anything, this is just an epic sentence. I teared up badly after reading that sentence.

THAT IS JUST. GOOD.

Alone.

2010-10-10T00:20:00.007+08:00

Today I went out shopping. Alone.
No one was with me, which was quite awkward, since shopping is to be done with a partner or more.
But yeah, I do feel a tad bit free to roam around, get what I want, browse what I feel, eat what I crave for.

It seems usual for me to be alone.
I used to walk alone, drive alone.
Heck, I even stay alone.

I'm starting to feel like a recluse. Don't get me wrong, I like it.
I like it when I stay at home, watching my fave girls. Laughing like there's no tomorrow.
I like it when I walk alone, I feel the breeze, I take in the scenery.
I like it when I eat alone, I savour the food for good.

But,
what I really want is to be with you. I miss you with all my heart.

오랜 세월이 흘러도 영원히 너와 꿈꾸고 싶어
（Even a long time passes, I want to dream forever with you）

I'm sorry.

2010-09-27T00:45:00.002+08:00

I don't really know how to react to these situations.
It felt so far beyond my reach, and yet I feel the pain.
I'd wanna come and hold you in my arms. And yet I know I have to let you be alone for a while.

There's nothing much I can express through my words.
All I can do is wish for you to be happy again.

I'm sorry I wasn't there to walk you through this.
I wish I was.

I'll always be here, if you ever need me.
I'll always be here.

If only you'd knew I was always here.

Jesse

2010-02-22T11:52:00.005+08:00

Yesterday marked a really sad day for me, for the family, for all who knew Jesse.

She was a joy to our lives. She was the one who comforted me even though she couldn't understand me.

Today,

When I woke up.

There was nobody to talk to.

There was no loud bark.

There was no prancing around, trotting around.

She was gone.

She came to our house 7 years ago, still a baby.

She had a weird face, she was small.

We had tons and tons of fun with her.

One day, my brother decided to make her a character that would be humane.

She became something important in our lives.

We took thousands and thousands of photos, videos.

She was a STAR.

I couldn't bear myself to tell you what happened last night.

Maybe it was something I told her. Maybe it was me who didn't look after her.

Maybe it was really Ti Gong who really loved her, asked her to be with Ti Gong.

She was so cute when she sat down in front of the praying table, as if she was kneeling down, praying.

I miss her.

I miss her loud, high pitched, yet funny bark.

I miss her selfishness to the fact she will gobble everything up, not wanting to share food with others.

I miss her fetishes for cloth and cushion. She would sit and sleep in comfy cushions all day long.

I miss her funny, paper thin tongue. She would lick us if we had food on our fingers, she would lick our lips. Just like a cute baby.

I miss her fur. He warm fuzzy fur. Her funny mullet fur around the neck. She loved us stroking her for hours.

I miss her bendy legs. I could never teach her to give me a handshake.

I miss her big brown eyes. She would tear up anytime.

I miss her non-extensive tail. Short yet I see her wagging vigorously everytime we opened the door to give her some food.

I miss her so much, it hurts inside so badly.

I hate getting a pet because I would be so emotionally attached to them.

But now, Jesse has become so important in everyone’s lives.

Everyone loved her.

To whom has read this, please say a little prayer for her.

No matter you’re a Muslim, a Buddhist, a Taoist, a Hindu, a Sikh, a Catholic, a Christian, atheist, etc.

So a little prayer for her.

She was hurting when she left.

Make her comfortable up there. Make her happy up there.

She deserves the best.

If she was reincarnated, I wish she was a person.

I would be her best friend. I would take care of her.

R.I.P Jesse Goh.

Aged 7 dog years.

Passed away 1.30am on 22^nd February 2010.

Which one would you choose?

2010-02-21T15:12:00.002+08:00

This?

Abit biased coz this trailer doesn't show much on LA.

Let them tell you how it is about LA.

Which one would you choose?

New Year's

2010-01-07T00:25:00.002+08:00

Whatta year it was for me.
I was nothing in 2009.
I went from something to nothing in 2009.
Everyone I knew was moving ahead, I was stuck without any help at all.

I travelled to a place.
I did a multi-million project.
I became closer to my family.
I searched for a way to survive.
I took a year off.

Then 2010 came. I was browsing through everyone's Facebook status, and all I saw was people whom I knew that they couldn't even bother about caring for others, people who think they are content with their perfect lives, people who don't give a f*** about me. They were lamenting, cursing, worrying, groaning about the lives that they have right now.

What do they know?

I couldn't help but SMILE. I felt I was in a good position right now. I have a job offer which I'm still contemplating, an interview, a dream job coming soon. And I've grown closer to a person whom I still care deeply for.

I LAUGHED at those silly people.

Why did you think you could be happy and yet grumble about your work?
Why did you think you could buy nice things for your 'friends', just to make them stay as your friends?
Why are you complaining about a job that you have that pays well?
What kind of dreams that you have anyway?

I scoffed. I used to think I have a dream job. But unfortunately I have to let go of it. I knew I wasn't confident enough, and I don't have that talent at all. Luckily, another door opened for me. I hope I'll get it.

I know 2010 is my time. And I know I will step on those who have ridiculed, looked down on me.
Do not think that you reign over me by just having what I use to have. You may have friends whom you lavish great gifts, have nice parties, socialize like a butterfly, and yet you are always the one who I look down.

I felt really good reading those status updates. I couldn't say taking a year off was my best option, but I think it did me well.

Christmas Woes

2009-12-25T20:20:00.002+08:00

I have to say this year is the WORST EVER Christmas I've ever had.
No celebrations. Not even a dinner. Not even a nice meal. Nothing.

Too bad the man of the hour goes to someone I'm related.
This year has been my worse year. "Nothingness" can be used to describe my year.

Have a Merry X'mas to the fortunate ones.

It feels like eternity talking to you.

2009-11-02T23:48:00.003+08:00

To you know who I'm talking about.

This is the last thing I would ever tell you.
Even though you couldn't bring your eyes to read this.
What stems out is this racism thing that everyone has, secretly or unabashedly.
Have you thought about thinking in other people's shoes?
Have you thought about the what ifs?
Have you thought about every single word that you said is like a double-edged sword, cutting to and fro into our hearts?
Our hearts that when you first lost your way, we gave them to you?
You wouldn't feel a thing when I say this to you, don't you?

It feels like eternity talking to you.
With your ramblings and certain brain mush that I did not judge you for.
We welcomed your return. You said you would come back every year, willingly.
But it happened.
I can't help to say I'm not that racist, but it was someone who made you turn your back to us.
Someone I had never seen, someone you only knew for a year. Someone you knew you didn't have a chance, and yet you fell for the deja vu again.

Nobody could pull you up again. Nobody. But us.
We tried so hard. I, tried to talk some sense and yet listen to your stories.
But now, you have become such obsessed with anti-racism in us, that you clearly wanted to not associate yourself with us.
The impact that you would do, the great lengths that you would go for someone who would reciprocate your love. For something that you already knew.

We always welcome you back.
But this time it is your choice.
If you do something not right, you would not understand how deep this will hurt someone you clearly love since you were born.

I have already told you.
NOBODY IS PERFECT.
NOBODY DARES TO SAY THEY ARE NOT RACIST.
But for you to come out holier-than-thou, this calls for harsh actions.
I'm sorry to say but I've never been so disappointed in you IN MY ENTIRE LIFE.

You, who once looked up to me.
You, who I never looked down upon for you imperfections.
You, who once said that family is the most important thing in my life.
If you dare to say you wanted nothing to do with us, please do not take care of my mother. Please don't. If you do not share her views, never mind, but do not insult her.
Please do not be someone who calls her a ***** and say I will take care of her.
Please don't.

SHE WON'T LET YOU EITHER.

I hope you are happy about what you have said and done. And for what it's worth, I hope you are satisfied with it.

I dated Summer Finn today. And got dumped.

2009-10-13T20:48:00.009+08:00

Mindfucked.
By Summer Finn.
Yes I tell you.
I dated her for 1 and 40 mins today. And got dumped.
But I'm no Tom Hansen. I'm just someone who knows how it's like to be Tom Hansen.

THIS IS A STORY ABOUT LOVE. NOT A LOVE STORY.

I love this movie. It's so simple, and yet you get blown in the face by this blue-eyed, Katy Perry lookalike of Zooey Deschanel. She was just so easy, and yet her eyes draws you in just like that. Even the camera loves her, focusing on her eyes. Just her eyes. And she goes into a rant "I'm not looking into a relationship right now." What do you do exactly, Tom? Do you keep it casual? Hold hands in Ikea? Shower sex? Sleepovers? What does it mean?

"So what do you think...this thing we are doing now?"

It was good. So good. The continuity and plot was so simple. And yet the editing was superb, leaving you the days that he was with Summer, breaking up with her (he was dumped), all so clear, complete with colors (red or blue for good happy days, grey or black for days that he was not that OK with Summer). And some people said it was hard to understand?! WTF?! Are you all robots?!

It's always that look..you know you were the one for each other. And it all falls apart.

This chronicles the first day he met her. And it drags on...till it was times up. Till he saw something happened in front of his eyes, that he knew it was over. I could relate to it, seeing that people around me were mulling around, moping, hoping that the other person could get back with them. Tom said "I don't wanna get over her, I wanna get her back." Suit yourself, Tom.

The beautiful LA skyline. And 2 beautiful people.

The whole movie was in Los Angeles. And I didn't know they had really nice buildings there. All I thought it could be only contemporary buildings there. Oh boy, it was really nice. I hope I could see them soon.

I don't normally do reviews, but I did watch this ALONE. And when you watch movies alone, the emotion is magnified to a million times. And all I tried was not to bawl my eyes out. I left with a teary eye and a lump in my throat. LOVED IT.

500 Days of Summer. 500 days of loneliness.

Am I worth it? Are you worth it?

2009-10-12T21:25:00.002+08:00

Sometimes people do really take you for granted. I guarantee you that.
All the good things, all the nice things, they really do think you're just a regular person trying to help you out.
Once it all dies down, once the tables turn, you know you won't get a good favor from them. You know you won't. But you still do it. You still fall headlong in to this ugly, ugly trap. You think you're worth doing this for them. You're worth something to them.

IT'S STUPID.

It's always something dark, down there, your heart.
It's always an uphill battle, trying to fight it. You know you can win. but you just don't want to.
You are that naive.

You have been warned, by people who are crystal clear on this. Level headed people.
You get stuck in the middle. You turn, nobody saves you. You tell that person, all you get is a hug, a pat. Nothing more.

In the end, it consumes you.
It eats you alive.
What is left of you? Nothing.
Not love. Nothing.

So are you still worth it?
Am I still worthy of you?

Mooncake = Reunion?

2009-10-03T12:39:00.002+08:00

Today is a wholesome day.
It's the Mooncake Festival.
And yet, I'm not wholesome enough.
Petty issues propping up from left, right and center.
I don't meet up with people I do care, because there will be people whom I would not seem to care, chaperoning that person.

Well, anyway, I do hope time will make us, or them see things aren't that flowery in their garden, as like mine.
Happiness isn't putting up a good show-off celebration for people to see.
Happiness isn't trying to segregate a group of people.
Happiness isn't dictatorship-ing your house parking.

Happy mooncake festival everyone.

Nice to see you again

2009-09-29T23:11:00.002+08:00

It's a weird and awkward sentence.
It's a getaway greeting.

I had that encounter just now tonight.
I would not even bother to say that to the person.
What made me say that sentence?
It would have been out of courtesy.

I might just upgraded my courtesy level today.
Woohoo.
When is my EQ upgrading?

Sometimes we fail miserably

2009-09-14T23:23:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, we thought we had made our point.
Mostly, we made a mess out of ourselves.

Sometimes, we knew we did the right thing.
Mostly, we made the wrong choice.

Sometimes, we had the greatest confidence when we make decisions.
Mostly, it'll be ugly.

What I did was I made myself an honest person.
But I was shot down like an American plane during World War II.
Is it too late to make amends?
Should I make those amends?

Gag

2009-09-14T14:02:00.003+08:00

I guess Rihanna really called for 'No Air' coz she was punched out by Chris Brown. Hahaha.

Depression

2009-09-03T14:46:00.002+08:00

I have been trying to keep my composure on this matter for quite a long time.
I do have a mild depression problem.
But what others know is that I look like a total BITCH, feeling that everything is not up to my liking.
What do don't know know is I get irritated at every single thing which I cannot control, which I thought I could control at the first place.

It's okay coz I feel happy when I'm OK, but it's just small mood swings that makes me only tear up, cry. It's not I'll do violent stuff like smash things up, or sabotage people who I don't like.
It's okay coz I DON'T NEED MEDS LIKE PEOPLE WITH SEVERE DEPRESSION.

I don't like coming out and telling this. But it's already taking its toll on my mental health. And it doesn't help when I'm a hopeless hopeless romantic. I'll see tons and tons of lovey dovey stuff, coz that makes me really happy. But at the same time it makes me sad. Makes me wonder why I can't do it. Does that mean I'm gender confused? Does that mean I can't get it?

Maybe I've been hurt by people I loved and liked for all this time. People who I think I really could trust and feel happy by their kindness to me. But they really take me for granted and they thought I could be okay with changing things around without consulting me about it.
I know I can stick to my own planning, but if you move things around without letting me know, it's like ruining something I had done so long. Makes me feel incompetent. Yeah you will think "cheh this small thing also want to feel sad. Get a life lah." But how does it feel when you're the one who is getting all this flak?

I've gad a thinking of whether I should leave all this and go somewhere new? My family is really supportive of me going overseas to work. But there are people who thinks I can't leave this all behind. What am I going to do when the people like friends and acquaintances are not appreciating what I do, and only care how they live their life? People who just ask: "hey how are you? I heard you are sick? Get well. take care. goodbye"There was no REAL concern at all.

I need to work out my depression and hoep I really can do something so that I get my positive side back. I need someone who can really care for me, guy or girl. I can really say, love doesn't really borders gender right now. If I can find someone who genuinely cares about me, then I think I'm whatever I can be. Go Portia and Ellen! Go Ashton and Demi! Go Penn and Blake! Go Adam and his boyfriend!

Just so you know, I have job interviews and also I'm contemplating on doing some working holiday or work and travel in the States, which I wanted to go there since I was small. But let's keep my hopes low and not wish too much. OR ASSUME too much.

Had a small birthday which I hoped had been a bit louder and merrier. But I'm now a recluse. Go Derrin. Way to go.

Pictures

2009-08-29T01:50:00.003+08:00

I'd like to run away.

Similar.

Simple happiness.

What makes me smile all along.

Shorts

2009-03-28T01:36:00.002+08:00

It's been awhile since I came here.
I've been trying to pick up pieces, pieces of broken glasses.
And I've been better.

Right now, I'm facing difficulties.
Difficulties in facing my problems,
difficulties in facing my 'friends',
difficulties in facing myself.

I have two options to go on.
And yet, I am still walking around in circles.
I hate the economy,
I hate the politics,
I hate the social life,
I hate pretentious people who stalk people's updates and then gossip.
I hate gossip.
Mostly, I hate myself more.

I am going through a very rough patch now.
It feels better to write at night, where everything is still.

I don't know what to do. Yet.
To some people, they are still unfazed, oblivious about things going around them.
I hate them.

But yet, I cannot do anything about it.
I am THAT HELPLESS.

It's Over

2009-03-09T15:05:00.001+08:00

I guess its true.
So it's over.
I had to pretend there is nothing wrong with me.
Deep down, I feel it so hard, crashing down on me.

The journey's over,
the time is up.
So long,
farewell.

25 Randomness

2009-02-15T22:45:00.002+08:00

Actually I did one in my Facebook notes...but I do love writing random stuff, 'cause I don't think people know me enough, until they don't get what I mean, and thus become my enemy or someone they think is redundant. So here's my 2nd version of 25 Things. I won't tag anyone, but feel free to comment.

1) I do like dogs and cats, but I can't bear to scoop their poo and bathe them often.

2) Kids and babies that scream and talk a lot irritates me.

3) Come to that, I've been kicked in the shins and slapped at by kids.

4) People don't really know my taste in music, they just know I like music. Well guys, I like jazz, big band, RnB and really good guitary and piano pieces.

5) I've never been to any white-man-country (eg US or Australia).

6) A lot of people don't know I write stuff.

7) A lot of people just know that I'm quiet and resentful. Haha.

8) I feel very old 'cause I think most of the jobs that I apply to need people that are in their early 20s (not me, I'm 24).

9) I've turned down more jobs than I applied for.

10) I am more superior in sports and racing games when I play those video games.

11) I have an uncle who is the same age as my brother.

12) My dog Jesse has more nicknames than the 13 states of Malaysia.

13) I used to have too many Chinese new Year clothes until I could wear them until after 17 days of Chinese New Year.

14) I despise people who could talk bad about people, yet when people talk bad about them, they flip. (really lame bitch)

15) I love watches and I am planning to get another one after my Fossil watch.

16) I have a crush on Ethan Ruan and Zac Efron.

17) My past idols have include: Anita Mui(!!), Vivian Chow, Sammi Cheng, Gigi Leung, Vicki Zhao, Spice Girls, B*witched, Westlife, and others that I cannot remember.

18) I am coughing so badly while typing this post.

19) I wished I could celebrate my birthday with my friends from high school or whoever I can feel comfortable with. But I guess this year is bad, since I have no more friends.

20) My most liberated moment is when I was in college. I had the best 2 years in my life, regardless of tears and broken friendships.

21) The age that I waited eagerly for, and I had the best birthday ever.

22) I had won more awards in primary school than secondary school, college and university put together!

23) My fave number right now. ;)

24) I hate people who doesn't know what's going on in the world and can only manage a " I'm too busy to care about these things" sentence to me. Stuck up.

25) I would rather change my stereo system in my car, rather than adding some aerokit or spoilers.

That's all. I could write more, but 25 things is enough.
If you wanna tag yourself, go ahead, but remember to link it back to me! Thanks.

别为无谓的人流泪了

2009-02-05T23:54:00.002+08:00

是的。
我很想突然写中文来发泄我的心情。
够了。
真的够了。

我不能再为无谓的人流泪了。
我不再觉得可惜了。
没关系，我自己来。
反正人一出世就是孤独的，
走的时候也是孤独的。

也许，
朋友多、知己多，
并不是好事。
也许有些是混水摸鱼的人。

昨晚听到一句话。
你恨的人、你讨厌的人，
其实活在这个世界上就是让你知道，憎恨和讨厌的意义。
也许会有更可恨、更讨厌的人在你未来的里程碑呢！

有时候会觉得好可惜，
可是流泪，难过并没有用。
别人只是当你是个过客。
何必荒废光阴青春？

够了。
也许是个过程，让我了解这一切。
够了。
也许大家还在做表面功夫，私底下争个你死我活呢。

至少，
我不会再为你们流泪，
我不会再为你们生气。
就算见面，
也只是个过客。

够了。

The End Is Nearing

2009-02-02T00:11:00.000+08:00

Words cannot come out of my mouth.
The end is nearing.
Thank you for telling me earlier.
I should've known.

Thanks for the journey.
Wait till its the end.

Laughter

2009-01-30T22:48:00.002+08:00

I went to watch a movie with my family on CNY.

It was a ritual for us to watch something light, funny on CNY.

So it was natural for me to pick All's Well Ends Well 2009.

With Sandra Ng, Raymond Wong, Ronald Cheng and Louis Koo in it, you can't go wrong.

AND LAUGHED I DID.

I hadn't laughed in cinemas for quite a long time, even if i was watching something funny.

But if it was really sad, I would cry and cry.

That day, I laughed. From start to finish.

I felt a sense of happiness, or freedom suppose? Free from negative thoughts?

Anyway, Gong Xi Fatt Chai to anyone reading. If anyone still cares. But what the heck, I like being alone for a while.

Just Go and watch

2009-01-25T01:27:00.001+08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dCGagwApwV0

Welcome, Mr Barack Obama, The 44th President of U.S.A

2009-01-21T01:57:00.003+08:00

I was quite emotional when he walked in.

He brought the hope that the Americans needed.

He fueled changes that were to be fulfilled.

He could be THAT ONE.

The one who could right the wrongs.

The one who we, the Malaysians could emulate.

The one who I, could hope he can Change.

Yes, we need to change.

Yes, I need to change.

Yes We Can,

Yes I Can.

Welcome Mr Barack Hussein Obama,

THE 44TH PRESIDENT OF USA.

May God Bless You and America.

And may whatever gods that watch over us, protect us in the coming years.

One more thing.

Who says politics is boring?

For those I know think that the inauguration of Barack Obama means nothing to them,

think again.

He will be the one to change the world, be it economy, political, environmental, international, whatever you can think of.

If you think you can go n without having a care, think again.

Without him, you would be nothing.

Think again.

Growing Up

2009-01-15T20:37:00.002+08:00

I used to think that growing up only happens when you're hitting puberty. But I grow up again and again. Until now, I still grow up.

I had to grow up. And move on.
Come to think of it, am I still a child?
Or people are still teething, yet I grew up too fast?

I have to move on.
I have to grow up.
Or maybe they should grow up.

So long, the stupid side of me.
So long, the idiot side of me.
So long, the ever so naive side of me.
So long, the old me.

So long to you too.

To You

2009-01-10T19:14:00.003+08:00

Feeling abit down. Need to write more of my thoughts right now.
I've seen so many people commenting on what I write in my blog.
But as you can see, there's no one leaving comments.
Ahh...you do know there is one thing called 'word of mouth'?

I simply have to say this.
Thanks for reading my blog.
I do know that blogs are for people to read.
You can leave your comment here too.
But please do not go and :"hey, have you read her blog?"
"She said something about you...blah blah blah."
Oh, so now I'm a gossip girl?
So now I do stir shites?

I wanted to rant out.
but all I got were hearsayers spinning the web of lies.
And don't think I don't know who you are.
You can invite people to read.
If you think you don't like what I write, tell me TO MY FACE.
Not discuss with your sleazy friends, who happen to be my friends too.

If you read it and don't feel like commenting, then don't.
And by not commenting, you do not tell to others.
Keep it to yourself.
I know who reads it.
I know who 'invited' others to read my blog.

So I just had to rant this out.
Well, if you don't like it, then TELL IT TO ME.

Maybe I need to change crowds. Just maybe.
I need a life too.

Conflict and Ganging up

2009-01-10T18:20:00.002+08:00

You know, I seem to have lots of these b*shites going on.
It might just be me. Yeah.
I have a solemn face. Yeah I do.
I don't talk when I'm mad. Yes I do.

But you know what, why does it have to be me who is going on about this?
Does it mean I have bad interpersonal skills?
Does it mean I have my own principle that is shit?
Does it mean I will have to grovel at their feet and beg for forgiveness?

I do know that there is someone who deserves what I do.
Do you want me to name names?
Do you?

I've thought about leaving all this behind, find new friends.
Am so disappointed with friends, friends who I thought could stick with me through thick and thin.
Friends who could differentiate from good people.
Friends who knew that the person was BAD news and chose not to befriend him or her.

BUT NO.
All I had were friends who HAD to befriend that person because for the greater good of the GANG.
HAD to befriend that person so that everything will be rosy.
HAD to befriend that person even though they know that the person is using them and getting them to pick sides.

What is wrong with not picking sides?
What is wrong with sticking to the same friend for all these time?
I knew you since I came to KL.
You were a good friend, helped me. And I stuck with you even though people say bad things about you.
But what now? Continue to be friends with that person?
My brother was right. I'm not your mom, neither your partner. I could only watch and keep quiet. You know how it is when I say something. That person would stand out and spread things about me. It's not I've never been wounded.

And you, who claims to be someone that superior.
Do you know what? You can't be all godlike.
Yes you have a sound mind. But do you think whatever you say is appropriate?
I thought we were friends. So I thought I could accept and apology from you and move on.
BUT NO. YOU COULDN'T CLIMB DOWN FROM THAT PEDESTAL AND SAY SORRY TO ME.
I was so disappointed. Seems like a message from me to you fell on deaf ears. And you had the nerve to let people see that message, yet didn't know what I was talking about.
Seems to me that you never stray too far from our arch-nemesis, do you?

Do you want me to name names?
Do you?

S.H.E

2009-01-06T18:30:00.004+08:00

Crappy photos I know. Sorry.
I couldn't get my lens in time, so I was praying hard that it would suffice for me. WRONG.
Anyway, here are some pics when I went to see my lovelies.

Oh, I brought the camwhore queen with me. And now she's in the Fan's Club with me! Haha!

This is horrendous. Notice the people behind? That's what you get with S.H.E. Can't bear to remind myself with the Times Square incident. Packed like sardine. Smelt like everyone cause I was drenched with EVERYONE'S sweat. And they cancelled the autograph signing session! CRAP!

Am waiting for the 3 ladies... (no am not talking to you-know-who. just obligatory photo for the fan's club).

AHHHH...I hear sounds....and the emcee said: "I think S.H.E is here"...

OH NO. *pushing from behind ensues*

See!! See! My Hebe!! Managed to capture them when they arrived. HEBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBE!!!

This is really horrendous. You couldn't see me. I was pushed soooo hard against the barrier that now my arms hurt.

The nearest I could shoot. And this was taken by one of the members who could sit at the VIP zone! Need to get zoom lens....zooom...

Pose 1 for S.H.E robots.

Pose 2. Notice Hebe's pose didn't change? She was laughing damn hard.

And pose 3. Ella was really happy that day, despite all three of them were having a bad flu.

The other fan's club were celebrating their 6th birthday. Put our club to shame really. Haiz...

We were the first club here. Dunno what to do when they had all the committee come up. Wish I was on stage...Hebe...mmmm....

Funny thing. We were wondering whether Yan Wan Qian, the Astro Talent Quest 2008 champion was to come, since she was a big fan of S.H.E and my Hebe (MINE! MINE!). She didn't...until around 10pm, my friend saw her rushing over towards the stage, let them sign their album, passed her album to them, and went off. WoW. Must be one happy lass. Wish I was famous too.

Was really happy to see them. Once a year was enough for me. And they were in a jovial mood, saying nonsense on stage, cracked us up real good.

LOVE YA GUYS!

New Year Resolutions (Late Ones!)

2009-01-06T18:17:00.002+08:00

Havent been doing my New Year resolutions, because I tend to not follow anything at all.
But since I have a blog, and I hope to turn things around (stupid people and events happen to me all the time!), so I'm giving this a shot.

What I Hope To Do This Year:

1) Get a job.

2) Get someone to spend more time with me. (ie someone for a relationship? I'm 24 already.)

3) Get more money.

4) Get more new friends.

5) Get a new attitude.

6) Get at least an Apple product.

7) Get new lens for my Nikon D60.

What I Hope Not To Do:

1) Lose more friends.

2) Be pessismistic.

3) Be alone for special occasions.

4) Be jobless.

5) Be stuck in a 'gang conflict'.

6) Be the target of cynical and sarcastic comments. (yes bitches you know who you are)

That's all folks. Hope I can stick to it.

Heartbroken

2009-01-02T20:58:00.000+08:00

Am being betrayed.
No words can express now.
Please leave me alone.

It's 2009!

2009-01-01T22:09:00.002+08:00

My My...I've been so busy until I forgot to blog about the year 2008.

2008 was a year that many things happened. I got a job, lost it, had new friends, recovered some old schoolmates (thru Facebook!), lost more of the friends I had.

My family. There were good and bad. My brother came home for the holidays, yet he wasn't proud. He didn't score well to get into Uni. My sis, finished her SPM, yet is in National Service when I'm posting this article. My dad, had the best year apparently. Won the Agong's cup recently, but not leading the Perak team. The Melaka team had not won the Cup in 41 years. So that was a milestone. My mom. Hmmm. She had a bad year, health was not on her side. Had been in the hospital, to clinics, and more. Hope she has a good year ahead.

Year 2009.

I celebrated in the back of my CRV, where we were rushing back to Ipoh from Malacca just for my sis, who had to report to the Kuala Kangsar came on 1st Jan 2009. Although we were together as a family, it was somehow sad. It was the last day actually, with my brother going back to Adelaide on February 16th, and my sister coming back on March 11th. So it's just me and my parents. And I haven't gotten a job too.

There's one thing bugging me. I had a friend who SMS-ed me, saying she went clubbing on the 31st. I mean, fine, just enjoy. But what she did was, she SMOKED. And DRANKED.
That was the last straw. How many times could I advise her? Tears were in my eyes when she sent me this. I couldn't bear to think any more. It's just sad. I appreciate your honesty, but as my friend, I cannot bear this to happen. If you do respect me, then please, do not just present your honesty to me. Do what you think is right.

Hope 2009 is a good year. And don't make my heart broken again.

Tagged 2

2008-12-22T23:53:00.030+08:00

1. How old are you?

Am 23 this year, turning 24. And next year's my year. MOOOO.

2. Are you single?

Yes I am. Sadly for the past 23 years. Never been in love. At all. Infatuation the most, but that was all worthless. Maybe am destined to take care of my mom and dad.

3. In what age do you think you’ll get married?

Maybe NEVER? I dunno, it's too a far-fetched thing right now. With no one by my side, I'll be day-dreaming my way to Poughkeepsie. Maybe it's got to do with my family, marriage never seems perfect, although I do envy happy couples. Maybe. Just MAYBE.

4. Do you think you’ll be marrying the person you are with now?

Judging by the fact that I never had any guy friends...well...not much guy friends...I doubt that. Most of them are taken. Correction. ALL of them are taken. So unless I'm Ellen DeGeneres, I doubt I'll be marrying one of my kind. I mean I would if I was really in love with someone...but I guess my parents would kill me then. Hoho. Kidding.

5. If not, who do you want to marry?

Errrrr.....I dunno. Lemme see....eye candies aplenty in the entertainment industry, but na-da in the real world. Zac Efron-ish, with humour like Show Luo or Russell Peters, can cook like Curtis Stone...might be someone from Mars. I really dunno about this.

Can I have one of this? Oops no. He's taken.

Did I give him this panty? No.

Curtis: Can you take me home? I'll cook for you.

Me: Ooh yes.

6. Do you want a garden/beach wedding, or the traditional wedding?
Lemme see. I do want something very light, and simple. Traditional weddings are a bore. You gotta do this and that, and you gotta follow it very strictly, like a fire drill where you have to go where, do what and in the end, its a disappointment where some old aunties will say the food's not that great or too boring. Beach wedding would be nice, but it gets sticky in the end, I mean our skin and feet. I can't think of anything right now, get back to me when I have someone who I like? Thanks.

7. Your ideal motif?
Eh? You mean with all the 'We're getting MARRIED, you blind people!!!" motifs? Oh. NONONONONO. Nothing at all. Red seems fine, but don't be all blood red, it makes the whole event like some triad member sploshing red paint on your door! Not white, in case I kena the 'monthly issue'. Beige would be nice.

8. Where do you plan to go on a honeymoon?
You know, I suddenly remembered that there's one kind of wedding where everyone is invited to a place or a cruise ship, and they kinda have the honeymoon together with the guests that bride and groom invited. URGH. That is one big mistake. Who would wanna spend the first wedding night with rowdy guests and relatives??? WHO?? When you wanna spend some quiet and ahem time, you can't help but be afraid they might be keeping an eye on both of you! AH. Back to the question. I kinda like London or Paris, or even New York. Or Hokkaido. Or the Carribeans. But anyway, wherever is nice when you have someone you love with you. Even if it's Cameron Highlands or Redang Island.

9. How many guests do you think you’ll invite?
My family, his family. Some people who I think can behave well. Not those rowdy arses that drink and get ballistics. Like dad's friends and some of his family. URGH. Some friends that I think I still would be friends until that day. I wouldn't mind around 100 people that day, compared to 1000 people you don't know. If 1000 that is, I can open a concert! Haha.

10. Do you want an extravagant wedding or a simple wedding?
Simple. VERY SIMPLE. No wedding dresses with train like Princess Diana's. Just simple dress (can't believe I would wear a dress that day!), and a small bouquet of flowers? God I don't like flowers. Then food would be marvellously subtle yet extravagant in taste. I've tasted BAAAAAD food in a wedding, to which I was very HUNGRY since the 3rd course. No chinese meal in courses unless it's delicious. I can't starve my guests, right?

11. Do you want the traditional vows or something you’d make up on your own??
Errr....can I not have vows? I'm not actually stellar in public speaking, let alone exchanging mushy stuff in front of so many people! Darn...err...if I haaaadddd to, then I'll do it myself. I remembered watching one episode of Friends where Monica and Chandler were doing their vows, Rachel and Phoebe were so touched with Monica's, while Joey and Ross were laughing mad with Chandler's. In the process, Chandler stole Monica's vows and changed the names! Hmmm....if my husband were funny...then he might end up like that. Just simple stuff would do lah!

12. How many layers of cake do you want to have?
I've seen cheapo people using fake layers, and then pretend to cut one layer like they have 4-5 layer!!! YOU CHEAP LIARS!! If you can't afford them then just do 1 or 2! Cheaters. Back to me, I'd like 1 or 2. Or see how many guests that I've invited. Simple. NO FAKE LAYERS!

In Nigella's words, hideous.

13. Do you prefer having your reception at a hotel or at a simple place?
I'd like it somewhere else. You can't find a hotel that is simple, 'cause they tend to have typical settings to it. But if I can really find some hotel that I like, there's no harm. Provided they have excellent service or food.

14. When do you want to get married, evening or morning?
Possibly when it's not too sunny, you wouldn't want the bride and groom, and everyone squinting their eyes right? I really hate those chinese weddings where the groom has to 'fetch' the bride at a specific time, and it's usually morning. Have to wake up damn early to do make-up and put on the wedding gown. Darn. Hate it. Can't we be flexible?? AH, IF YOU INVOKE THE GODS THEN YOUR MARRIAGE WILL NOT BE SMOOTH AND HAPPY. Hmmph.

16. Do you like a grand entrance for your groom/bride?
No. I do not like people staring at me. Can I just stand there and wait for the groom instead?

17. Name the song/tune you’d like played at your wedding??
Erm. I guess no SHE songs, 'cause I would be singing also. HAHA. I dunno, haven't found a perfect song.

18. Are you a morning person or a night person?
Night person. Definitely. I always get some ideas or stuff to blog about when I lie in my bed. But am too lazy to do anything. In the end, I'll forget everything in the morning. Bah.

19. Do you want a solemn ceremony or a light one?
A light one of course. Solemn one means every single person would be pulling long faces in that ceremony. And I don't look good when I am solemn.

20. What age do you want to get married?
When I do find someone I guess. I'll just keep trying. But after 50, I think I will give up. No hope then.

21. Describe your ideal husband/wife.
Zac? But he likes long hair, and quite vain I guess. Just simple clean cut look would do. It could be like Leehom, but he's a workaholic. I can be quite dependent if given the occasion. Well, as long as he's okay then I don't mind.

22. Do you prefer fine dining or just the normal spoon & fork/knife?
It all depends on the food I guess.

23. Champagne or red wine?
Champagne seems light enough. I don't really like wine and stuff.

24. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding?
Right after, 'cause I'm one person who will do things right till the end. If you leave it like that, then I won't have the mood anymore.

25. Money or household item?
Money. No household items. I dunno how to use them anyway.

26. Who will pay for the bills?
He would. But I might foot some. Might.

27. Are you ready for married life?
I guess so. Some of my friends are married with kids. Darn. Must be getting old. But married life is another dimension altogether, so I'll have to think twice.

28. Do u think you will still be a virgin until u get married?
Harharhar....would my mom see this?? Errr....she thinks that we dunno these stuff. I hope that I will be 'happy' when I get married. 'Cause guys are hard to please, and so am I. Does that answer your question? *face reddens*

29. Will u always be true to your wife/husband?
Cancerians and those who are born in the year of the ox are noted for loyalty. Whaddya mean I will always be true to my spouse or not? What kind of question is that?!

30. How many kids do u like?
I dunno. Seeing that I'm the one who will be popping them in my oven, 1 or 2 would be fine. But that all depends on him.

31. A new house for a newly wed or an old one?
New one, and a very spacious one. I don't want to clean them everyday, so a service apartment would be quite nice. Lazy mah.

32. Will u celebrate silver wedding, gold wedding, or diamond wedding?
Till death do us part?

33. What kind of cuisine would u like for ur wedding?
Something simple. Something Gordon Ramsay, Jamie Oliver, Nigella Lawson, or Kylie Kwong would do. So they would be my cooks for that day! HA!

34. Will u record ur honeymoon in a cd or dvd?
Mmmm. Yeah. Of course. Would I include some steamy honeymoon action? I'm not Edison leh.

35. Whose wedding plans would you like to know next??? choose 5 people
Reuben Kang.
Canny Teh.
Yurong.
Baihe.
Elaine Tan.

Tagged 1

2008-12-22T15:03:00.007+08:00

1.The last person to tag you is?
My sis. Who's been tagging this for a month!

2.Your relationship with him/her?
What's more to say? HAHAHAHAHA.

3.Your 5 impression towards him/her?
Attention hogger, pervert, crazy, neglecting her doggie, and violent as well.

4.The most memorable thing that he/she has ever done for you?
Can't remember actually.

5.The most memorable words that he/she has say to you?
"Jie~~~" 'Coz that means you'll have to take care of her.

6. If he/she becomes your lover, you will...
SORRY I DON'T DO INCEST.

7. If he/she becomes your enemy, you will...

SORRY I DON'T DO SIBLING RIVALRY.

8. If he/she becomes your lover, he/she has to improve on...
LOSE WEIGHT, FAT GIRL! (spoken in true Russell Peters style)

9. If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason is...
She took away mum's love from me...boohoo...TT_TT

10. The most desirable things to do for him/her is...
Hope that she turns out fine in life later.

11. Overall impression towards him/her is...
My sis lorrr....what more can you say??

12. How do you think the people around you will feel about you?

Emo kid...and keerrraaazzzzeee...

13. The character of you for yourself is?
Emotional, and too helpful in a way that I'll get hurt emotionally.

14. On contrary, the character you hate of yourself is?
Too emotional until I'm not that professional at all.

15. The most ideal person you want to be is?
A happy, loving person. (being deceitful is my motto,haha)

16. For the person who cares and likes you, say something about them?
Errrrrrr...thanks???

17. Bra or panties?
I'd like both on, thanks very much!

18. Chocolate or ice-cream?
Neither, but will choose ice cream i guess.

19. 10 people to tag.
1 Phillip Goh
2 Elaine Tan
3 Shuk Ling
4 Canny Teh
5 Yeong Keat Mei
6 Joy Lee
7 Reuben Kang
8 Goh Hong Kiat
9 Lee Pai Seang
10 Chey Feng Mey

19. Is 3 a male or a female?
A female of course.

20. If number 7 and 10 got together, would that be a good thing?
WOOWOWW...i bet their partners wouldn't think so....

20. Who is number 2 having a relationship with?
Some one 'special'??

21. How about 5 and 8?
Hmmm...dunno about that...they both went to Australia to study...might be a good match...but age should be a matter..

22. What is number 1 studying about?
KUAKUAKUAKUA....engineering???

23. When was the last time you had a chat with them?
Does MSN count?

24. Is number 4 single?
NO! She is taken, people! Lay off!

25. Say something about number 2.

My bestie since uni!!! Love her to bits!

26. What do you think about number 3 and 6 being together?
Mmmmm...they don't do homos i'm for sure!

27. Describe number 9.

Old uncle of the decade!!! Joker of the uni lah!!!

28. What will you do if number 6 and 7 fights?
I will stand there and cheer them on! I will also be very grateful that I didn't go to Lim Kok Wing and stay in Subang when I was little!! hahaa...

I QUIT! (sorta...)

2008-11-28T16:08:00.002+08:00

That's it. I QUIT!

Well, I am officially jobless.

I can't say much, but it came too suddenly for me.
I can just say, they didn't keep their promise. And yet they were quick to make decisions that we didn't know.

DISAPPOINTED.

Anyone has jobs to offer?

Another crap planning.

2008-11-23T15:46:00.002+08:00

Am getting very very pissed.
I believe being a pilot is very proud and all, but if everyone keeps flying planes and kites, then it's not a big deal to be a pilot.

Am freakingly pissed.
Someday can I do that to piss you guys off?
But I guess you don't care too, coz you guys will have each other.

Feels like shit to be alone.

That's It.

2008-11-23T01:06:00.003+08:00

That's it.

I used to think I was a jinx when i planned anything. It would either nobody could come for some occasion, or nobody would go.

I've had enough. Twice in a day is enough. If you people wanna go anywhere or something, don't, DON'T ASK ME TO PLAN.

You don't know how disappointed I was. You don't know how much happiness I had. I thought I had the whole thing in control. Then, in one afternoon, everything came crashing down.

Sorry. I had enough.

Another thing.

I am tired and sick of people who are farking thinks they are smart-assed and self-absorbed.
Yes you do play good game. But it's just a freeeekkkkiiinnnn GAME. You do not need to be proud.

Sarcasm is my middle name. But your sarcasm is waaaaayyyy overboard. I could have strangled you then and there. Maybe you should keep your fat mouth shut. Maybe I should rip it off your face. But I chose not too. Because I see you as a acquaintance. Not a friend, but someone I know for sometime. A decency to apologize is adequate. But I guess you are either too ignorant or too self-absorbed to apologize. One more time and I guess you will know how it feels. I believe that you do not like people talking about you and a 'special someone', but we are your best 'sarcasm dartboard'? Get a life.

I have sooooo much to rant this time.

What's it with people taking sides???
A gang of friends, throw in some firestarter aunties, and you get some siding actions.
I guess I can never win those kepohchi aunties, but you know what, I guess I have no fate to be close to you. You can forget my birthday, you can forget our birthday, whatever.

Oh yeah, I guess if you think you have someone to celebrate it with, we don't need to celebrate it with you!! YES LET'S DO THAT!!!

I'm sick and tired with these bitches.
Maybe I'm a bitch myself.
At least I'm not a slut. Harhar.

Ladies and Gentlemen...

2008-10-25T23:58:00.000+08:00

Hello all,

This trip is coming to an end soon.

I will be ending my dream soon.

Thanks and have a nice day.

This one takes the cake!

2008-10-14T00:02:00.000+08:00

I was meant to be blogging about the joys of commercial shoot, but alas, i guess it's no use.
I had the worst day of my life. I've never been so angry until my hands were shaking. My hands went numb. I was red in the ear. I couldn't breathe.

In my life, there will always be enemies. There will always be people that you don't wish to see them alive. But today, this person takes the cake.

This line producer, we shall call her Haywire, or HW shall we?

She is in our latest project, which I think is spooked or cursed, because everything is farked up. As a freelancer who has experience in tv shows, she could have at least done something right, after all these year, right?

WRONG.

She is only in charge of flight tickets, transportation and 1 location. And she can even make mistakes. GOD.

She has a history since another job, which the others claim she farked up big time. BIG TIME AS IN SHE WENT TO B**CH ABOUT THE PRODUCER'S STUFF.

She went to the right people I guess. The Agency.

She has a knack of 'slapping the horse's butt' I would say. Mengampu betul...And she would b**ch about others to other people. Oh did I mention, EVERYONE except HER.

So now, I am totally not respecting her, because she is not worthy of respect. And now, she is trying to sabotage me.

I did 3 things: a room arrangement list, a transportation list on who's with who in a van, and a travel movement.
SHE WENT AND DID ONE HERSELF. When the other line producer SY asked her, she said: "I just don't trust her."

WTF??????????!!!!!!!!!!!

So now u mean I'm doing nothing lah???!!!

She also arranged the van movement so bad, that The Asst Director was fed up with her. And I was supposed to take the talents to Cameron, which she strongly opposed, asking me to go Teluk Intan, swap cars and go with the team.

HELLO!!! Siao ar you!

She said it would incur costs when I do that. And she gave me tons of excuses. TONS.
I said maybe XX need my help in Cameron. She has no car, nothing. How could she travel anywhere??
She gave me an answer that would kill us all. " There is a Taxi stand there."

WAHLAU EH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was sooooooooooooooooooooooo mad that I nearly screamed at her. But I held back. And it was raging inside me. Until I couldn't breathe.

Tomorrow. I will confront her. Should I paste her photo her? In case anybody wants to know?

BTW, she is 30 years old. She should know better.

4 Months into my job...and I'm torn apart...

2008-09-02T16:57:00.000+08:00

It's been ages since I've written an entry here...
I've been busy (or rather mulling over work) these past few months on the Tourism Malaysia job.
Actually it's not only a 2 month job, it's a job that has been going on until recently, thanks to the ingenious people in the advertising agency and clientele. (oh and not to mention the 'gigi rosak tapi orang bayar dental fees' punya Director General of Tourism Malaysia.)

So I'm stuck here.
Stuck because they have no ample staff (or no abled staff here).
Just because I did not apply for leave, they just chucked me and my friend around.
Kicked around like a round round ball.

I have voiced out to my management staff.
What do I get? Nothing.

What should I do?
I have 2 more months to my so-called 'probation period' (kena tipu jugak, coz the contract states that the probation period is 3 months, but it's already 4 months...).

SHOULD I WAIT FOR 6 MONTHS BEFORE I LEAVE?
OR SHOULD I LEAVE NOW?

WHAT SHOULD I DO???

Please Kill Me or I Will Starve

2008-06-04T22:45:00.002+08:00

WTF...the lovely and very caring Malaysian government has just announced that there will be a price hike in petrol starting 5th June 2008, 12am.

The price will be from RM1.92 to Rm2.70, a 78sen raise since March 2006...

GOOD OR NOT?!

So damn farking happy till I nearly vomit blood ler...

What are we supposed to do? Celebrate the price hike? Throw confetti around??

Good lah, since petrol is expensive, then the other stuff will might as well be expensive too lor!

The prices are rising, but the salary is not.

MALAYSIAN GOVERNMENT AR, CAN YOU ALSO RAISE OUR SALARY KE?!

REALLY PISSED.

*UPDATED: Electricity bills are also going up from July 1st. Muahaha...let's light candles and ride a bike to work. If I know how to ride a bike lah.

Siao people in the office...

2008-05-28T15:55:00.006+08:00

*yawns* I've just been awake after a gruelling day at work that kept me there until 3am...so tired...and when I came to work today (which is still work day when I wrote about this...), we went berserk. Here are proofs of our insanity:

Siao cha bos (frm left: Jolene, Tut Tut) having a Prego Moment.

It gets worse.

Ahaha...we will have more fun things to do later when we continue our phototaking sessions. Will post them up soon! Till then...*yawn*...

*UPDATED: Check out a stupid video made by us! Wohoooo...damn funny...

My Office Looks Like a Clinic To Me

2008-05-25T18:24:00.004+08:00

See? Chairs lined up one by one, waiting for the casting. It seems like they're lining up to get their daily dose of medicine.

We're doing casting at the mo', so tons and tons of either beautiful or just...ermm...nice people will turn up to try their luck for the commercial. Having fun so I can't complain much, just that it's mundane to do these stuff for the whole week!

I'm now known as 'G Nui', or G Girl, or in plain Canton 'Pig Girl' in my company, courtesy of my producer. And I'm in charge of logistics in the upcoming project. So, *fingers crossed* I will do good in my job!

Work Work and More Work!

2008-05-24T15:37:00.002+08:00

Finally...I found some work to do!
Not that I'm bragging about it, 'cause I did try to do something that I wasn't keen on, only to quit on the same day I reported to work! Poor people...the lady was very kind to let me go, but I can see that she was very disappointed. Sorry...

Okay! So what am I working on now?
I am doing production job, which surprised myself 'cause after a short stint with Popiah Pictures, I was not very keen on doing hectic work day and night. Luckily this company offered something new: TV commercials. As you know, I am an advert lover, so this could be an eye opener for me.

Anyway, only 1 week in the job...dunno what I can contribute yet..so *fingers crossed* I'll get a good gig soon!

David Archuleta Scares The Be-jesus Outta Me

2008-05-14T18:54:00.004+08:00

Oh my god...little boy with a big voice...

Just saw today's American Idol. The stakes are getting higher and higher. And this David Archuleta is not waning a single bit. God, he scares the hell out of me...everytime he sings, I get the goosebumps! He's only 17, but he never ever sings out of pitch...is he FOR REAL??

Anyway...had a rough day...been scalped by a potential employer, and yet I stood up to him and negotiated with him. Hope it turns out fine.

My Family: The Details

2008-05-07T18:50:00.014+08:00

Remember the photo that i posted? With all of my friends? That was during the birthday party for 2 people. It was a rare photo that all of us were there to celebrate a birthday.

So...wanna know more about my friends aka My Family here in KL?

Read On.

1. Helen Choo aka Stingy aka Bak Gu Zhi Zhu Jing

She's the one who is seen as the more affluent type, yet holds her purse tighter than my mouth. A local by nature, I've known her since my college days. She's the donkey of the gang, cause everyone LOVES to bully her. Muahaha...but we like her all the same.

2. Chey Feng Mey aka Chimky aka Mrs Lee

Blur case and one-third of the infamous Zoo Negara group. (the others I will intro). From Melaka, she is seen as a good producer, or maybe that we pushed her to be the producer often? A short fuse and gets emo easily, she became more subdued recently. Why you say. In love lor, what else. Romantically linked to Baba Lee for 1 year until they became a couple this year. Congrats!

3. Lee Pai Seang aka Baba Lee aka Mr Lee

Dunno why they called him Baba (father). But it originated from his 'daughters' from our class. A real joker (laughed like mad when he talk jokes and nonsense), he is a helpful guy and a computer whiz. The only downside? Blur, and VERY VERY MOH (slow).... now stuck with Chimky, he is more indecisive than EVER.

4. Teng Suet Mui aka Tiger aka Mui Mui

The second member of Zoo Negara group, Tiger Mui is one very very white Tiger... She's always running off during the weekends to JB, to where her heart belongs (YY)... Now based in Singapore, she is a deft in making handicrafts and singing old old old Chinese tunes...so good even she can compete in the Astro Golden Melody!

5. Melisa Lim aka Miao aka Water Lover

The best of our group. Melisa (or we call her Ah Miao) holds Distinction during Diploma days, and also First Class during her Degree days. Diligent worker yet she keeps lament that she doesn't know much (tipulah you!). Loves the beach and the pool, and her aim is avoid becoming white!

6. Tan Yee Lu aka Lulu aka White Lady

The whitest of the white in our gang. Oh no...you can even see through her! She seldom hangs out with us as she lives farther than us, but she always gets the juiciest gossip from Auntie Siew Hui. A kind girl at heart, she always comes out with a good solution whenever the occasion rises.

7. Foo Shuk Ling aka Zirafah aka Behling

Known her the longest since few weeks into college. She always comes to our rescue whenver we need help. She stands by her teacher Ms Tan and also any good lecturer (Mr Beh). Although I have hurt her feelings before, but she still treats me as a good friend. Thank you for it.

8. Teh Li Yin aka Nini Bobo aka Squirell

The mother of our group. Cooks a feast for 8 before. But she is the one with graphical creativity, that she honed from reading HK mags like Milk, Touch, etc. Always known for her 'woman;y curves', she is one to talk to when you need a shock into reality.

9. Auntie Yee Siew Hui and Uncle Lee Fo Sheng aka Mr and Mrs Lee 2 aka Golden Couple

Known since they were stuck together, Auntie Siew Hui and Uncle Lee were the couple most seen to tie the knot earliest. Although they have quarrels, they still stayed on until now. When will their wedding be?? Hmm...

10. Tan Fui Fong aka Lion aka Tut Tut

MY BESTEST BEST FRIEND. She is the gang leader of the Zoo Negara group. A loudmouth and a good PR, she is the one to book the karaoke sessions, or call to any place that we need to make bookings. Although she has a short fuse that sometimes made me disappointed, I still love her the same. Oh, and she's my spokesperson! Muahaha....Thanks pal, love ya for it!

So here you go. They are My Family, although we don't get together that often, I will still think of you guys. Thank you for being there for me. Hope we can meet again soon!

Hello People! I am LIVE on NET!

2008-04-15T19:35:00.003+08:00

ahahahahahaha!!!!!!

I AM OFFICIALLY YOUTHMALAYSIA.COM AMPLIFIER YOUTH!

Please read the intro ahaha...so funny!

Letting the cat out of the bag

2008-03-15T15:45:00.000+08:00

How are those ways of being a better leading figure?

GOD! This is sooooo damn boring! Sitting around, nothing to do, just lazing and watching your fave shows (I’m currently watching a forbidden thing: Sex and The City). It seems a wonderful dream to those corporate slaves, and to those who need a break. Well, it does seem great until…

I stumbled across an article pinned on my brother’s room’s notice board. He’s left to go to Adelaide for his studies. So I went in, and looked at this article. It was an article about how to be a better father. Seeing that, it gave me strength to write about that in here, in my blog.

What’s to say about my father? Well, you can say that he’s been giving since these few years, And he’s constantly pushing us to do things. Things that we didn’t want to do. But, there’s always a but in these situations. I can safely say that whilst all of you may think he is good at what he does for a living, and he has been able to live his dreams, we, as children have not been doing well in our lives.

10 Steps to being a better father.
Why’s that? So you can change your dad? I’m guessing a big no-no. For one, you gonna get a man pissed. FREEKINGLY PISSED. I have my own thoughts and reasons. But one sure thing is that, you better keep your thoughts to yourself. I once wished that I can do what people in the western hemisphere do, speak out. NOPE. YOU KEEP IT TO YOURSELF, MISSY. Maybe that Talian Nur that we have right now is handy for me?
-_-111

I red in that article that you need to have empathy during arguments. Well, hell no. Good luck when you pick a fight with him. Come to think of it, all of us will lose in that battle, no matter who you are. He thinks he is the ONE. THE ONE THAT WE CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT. HE IS ALMIGHTY BREADWINNER. You would think, aww come on, he’s your dad. You gotta give him respect. Yeah, I did. By keeping my fat mouth shut and keep on getting my income from him. Yeah, I did.

I just graduated, and I do need some time off to do my stuff. I wanted to set things right, and give myself some time to think about what I should do about my future. The he gives his POV about what I should do. Rake in big bucks. Do what you like. Oh, yeah. Like that’s gonna come rolling onto your lap. Cool.

Another thing high on the list is compassion. Okay, so he has compassion for the dog that we had at home. He has compassion to the car that he have at home. He has compassion to the deflated basketballs he left behind the laundry.

For now, I am keeping quiet. I have known a lot of stuff that he has did. And I could not do anything. Helpless again.

It's Tough Times Now

2008-03-12T23:21:00.002+08:00

Finding a job is hard.
I have sent countless resumes, CVs, whatever to numerous companies.
In some cases, I have sent twice!

Then they didn't even bother to tell me if I have been considered.

It's sad, considering one of it is my past job.
I do not know, whether they think that I have lost touch in my writings, or they don't want an about-turn person in their company.
These people I have always considered them as my best friends.
To think they are nice enough to say whether they considered me or not.

I am not being fussy here,
I'm looking for something to reignite my working passion.

When will I find it?

Dawn of a new era...but what will it be?

2008-03-09T23:47:00.002+08:00

Malaysia just voted. And it has been a rollercoaster ride.

In my state, which is Perak, it is being captured by opposition parties, namely, DAP, PKR and PAS.

The only problem is: who will become Menteri Besar?
The answer seems obvious but shocking.
PAS will take the seat.

So what does it make us?
I only hope that we don't become Islamic state.
If it does, then my dad's business will kaput.
And we will be broke.

God help us.
And I don't mean Allah.

Friends are so intoxicating

2008-02-22T16:46:00.000+08:00

Friends are so intoxicating. They make some people so stuff that they are not aware of. For example, a group of friends will “coax” someone to flash themselves in front of strangers after a few beers. A group of friends will “ensure” that someone will get laid after chatting up some random guy in the bar.

Friends are THAT intoxicating.

Stupid as it seems, I have been intoxicated before. Friends will stay up late and chat, and you will be sucked into this ‘dark matter’ which they call ‘bonding time’ to chat, gossip and hurl (after some really intoxicating alcohol).

But what does that intoxicating feeling do to you?

Is it really an alcohol of some sort? Or is it designer drugs? Are friends the new designer drugs? (Shit. After Sex and The City, I have become Carrie Bradshaw.) The kind of friends that I know of are those who help you to spur to greater heights, those who help and be with you when you are down, those who will come to your rescue everytime you are being dealt with the worst situation. But what does intoxicating friends do to you?

I have a situation here. My friends had a ‘get-together-party’ at their house (which I did not go) and one of my best pals decided to stay after they started playing poker. Now, here comes the tricky part: She decides to go home, but she is now stuck in the middle playing cards with friends. They cannot stop. She is losing RM30. (Yes, they are considered gambling).

I asked her to stay the night, since her house was quite far away.

She said she had things to do in the morning.

Okay….now I don’t see the whole picture.

You are playing cards (gambling, I suppose), and you are losing. It is already 2am. You have things to do in the morning. So what is the problem here?

That’s right folks. INTOXICATING FRIENDS.

I’m not bloody jealous because I’m not there. I’m not angry that they were gambling. I’m very confused as to which people tend to forget everything when they are with friends. What happens if you insist to go home, and you get mugged, raped or *horror* killed????

Would your friends say: “Oh, I’m sorry I asked you to stay until so late. Here, let me take care of you for the rest of your life.”?

Would your friends say: “Sorry it happened. We will pay for the brainwashing process.”

Who would care?!
The most they can do is send you flowers and comfort words. And they let you go on.

Even the government won’t take care of you for the rest of your life.

I’m not saying friends are bad, in case ‘eagle nosy parkers’ start to look at this post and say I’m a ASSHOLE. (Read the whole story, YOU ASSHOLE).

I’m just saying, PLEASE GET A GRIP. You are a grown person. I have no control over you. You should know what is right or wrong. If I was there, I would be considered a party-pooper. But I know when to stop this whole stay up late thing.

Some people live there. Some people don’t. What will happen to those who don’t live there? Stay the night then. But if you have other things to attend to the next day, FOR GOD’S SAKE PLEASE GO HOME EARLY.

I feel so helpless here.

But I can’t do anything. Because I’m a nobody.

I'm Addicted To...Sex And The City

2008-02-19T15:47:00.005+08:00

Shit...I love it so much!

Carrie Bradshaw, Samantha Jones, Charlotte York and Miranda Hobbes have been in my life these past few months, even though the show wrapped up four years ago.

Explicit words and scenes aside, the dialogues and acting are so intriguing that I can't help but fall in love with these four women...

And...

They are back! The latest Sex And The City: The Movie will be in cinemas (presumably not in Malaysia) on 30 May 2008! Can't wait!

What is the definition of living together?

2008-01-30T14:14:00.000+08:00

BORING DAY AGAIN. My bro has been constantly saying my blog is somewhat of a complaint box for me. Well, I would like to say is that: It is. Since no one is interested in my writings, I might as well make this blog as an escapade from my daily problems. It is nice to express myself for once.
I finally got to watch an old movie, since it had been shown in cinemas for about 2 years ago? It’s a teen flick or some chick amateur flick of some sort (yes, I like chick flick, romantic comedies, etc etc. I know I am studied film, but hey, it’s what I choose to like, you horror-loving morons). Starring Jaycee Chan and Fiona Xie, the English title’s called 2Young (Chinese: 早熟). I was touched by it, with some power acting by 毛舜君and 黄秋生。He was particularly stellar when he tried to arrange stuff for Fiona Xie when he found out her daughter was preggers. She shouted to him:”You always arrange things for me! You don’t even know what your daughter wants!” That brought tears to me…*sob*
But what makes me curious is when both Jaycee and Fiona run off to the countryside to live together. Jaycee makes money by doing odd-jobs and Fiona becomes a cute little housewife. And how do they survive? By eating maggi mee and canned foods, scouring for fishes in a nearby pond and sweet potatoes in a field. Walaoeh, got so nice a place to stay in HK meh? Abandoned place in Sai Kung, with nothing in it, they decorated it like heaven, then rich girl Fiona learns how to cook and wash, like oblivious to the fact that she is pregnant! Then Jaycee like so good, get money and give it all to Fiona. (wow, girls would drool for it!) And they had a small argument about nothing to talk anymore, and the end of the argument. Wow…what a fairytale story.
Here’s the main point: what is really, the definition of staying together? Call it what you want, living together, shack up, cohabit, 同居, bersekedudukan…but what does it actually mean?I won’t Wikipedia coz I think it is lame to do so. I’ve had several friends who does that with their partners, recently a bizarre case where they actually live together without being acknowledged as partners yet. So…………….that is really odd. As per usual, I’m not entitled to give my POV so that I might AGAIN offend people. But does anyone read it? SOOOO CONFUSING…might as well blow my head off, you people.
My definition of living together would be like, ok, you guys wanna stay together for purposes of saving rent costs, fine. Will think of trying to live together to see if relationships do work after marriage, ok, fine. Will think of trying to live together ‘coz erm…we have been staying together for past few months and we just got into this relationship so..what the heck! We might as well stay together now! Erm…that is just plain weird. I’m not saying that these people wanna live together for the sake of ‘we lived together before’ thingy. Maybe I am a conservative person, maybe I am not. But I just can’t help to think that people who just hooked up a few days would live together just before! Is it plain foreplay? Or is it just I dunno, plain wacko job? What are the ramifications? You could be like over the relationship but have to still have to stay in the same freakin’ room until the tenancy is over. What would your parents say if they found out a guy that has only been going out with you for a couple of weeks waking up next to you, shirtless (I’m not saying sleeping shirtless with the love-of-your-life is not good. I’m just saying, if you have banged her, then it’s legally ok)? The effects of living together is not really good. I once contemplated in living together if I have a bf, which I don’t. But someone, let’s call her T, told me the best thing in relationships is to keep a distance from each other. If you live together, the chances are arguments and possibly sick of each others faces (that is, if you people like to eat each others faces when kissing). Maybe some people love the idea of living together. There are happy endings to living together. What I am saying is: think before doing it. And to my friends, you know who you are, what’s happened during that past few months, I have absolutely no idea. Mind clearing that up?
So what is the definition of living together? You tell me. If you happen to read this of course. ( But I doubt it)

Sod Off! Need Anger Management? Or just don't piss me off!

2008-01-09T23:10:00.000+08:00

I'm feeling abit pissy these few days. And I start to wonder: what is it that no one agrees to what I've said or done? And why are they picking on stuff that I've suggested?

Take a simple scenario: whenever that I suggest a place or something to do, only a few agrees to follow. Others just somehow 'shimmy' away. And when the others do the same, then they say, 'Yeah OK!' WTF!

And another thing. I AM NOT LOADED. I HAVE NO MONEY OR WHATSOEVER. DO NOT THINK MY FAMILY IS FACKING RICH OR WHAT. THEY HAVE A BUSINESS. AND IF THAT BUSINESS IS DEEMED ILLEGAL IN THIS COUNTRY, GOD KNOWS WHAT WE WILL DO.

Don't you all know that your parents are the ones who are lucky and safe? So what if I have stuff that you guys don't? So what if I choose to live a better life? I do not have extra cash. I have to do something to get them, not just say, hey, I need rmxxx, and presto! I get it.
Absurd people. Stupid as they seem, they think I'm rich. Fools. They are the ones who should thank their lucky stars that they were born in a good family, with caring parents and siblings and a steady income. They don't know us, they don't know what my family have to strive to get what we have. And it could become bust suddenly. But no one seem to care. No one. All they think is that I'm well off than them.

I JUST CHOOSE TO LIVE BETTER. AND CHOOSE TO DO WHAT I WISH TO. NOT WORRY ABOUT MATERIALISTIC STUFF, SAY....MONEY???

I felt the compelling urge to strangle, wring off their heads and throw certain people in the murky dark waters of the Straits of Malacca. Don't think that you are shielding behind someone that you make yourself innocent. Even if that person thinks fondly of you, you still piss me off.

Maybe I need anger management. Maybe I am Niki Sanders, and inside me is Jessica. Maybe. Just maybe.

So why can't I let me dark side out?

My Friends

2007-12-30T00:07:00.000+08:00

This is my happy family.

And they are my friends.

Wanna know more about them?
I will post some descriptions about them soon.

It's sad that we will be separating soon, going our own ways.
Good luck in our future undertakings!

And take care.

It's official: I'm Unemployed!

2007-12-26T23:31:00.000+08:00

Finally, I'm done with all the assignments and exams...I'm finished with the crappy people that I had to put up during those days (same class summore...)!

But the cruel fact is: I'm unemployed.

Anyone with jobs, please contact me.

Thank You For Your Kindness.

Amen

Confused....and I'm speechless...Stupid Me.

2007-12-11T20:28:00.000+08:00

Let's see...am I the firestoker right now? You be the judge.

Please dun confuse us all ok??? Change d title of bj coursework file
Hey...u get us all confused ok??Just nw i opened it, hoping to see our marks...then...All onli T1 marks!!!Kena tipu aje!Please lah...do be careful in putting topic names...Not onli T1 ppl surfing this page ok?Thanks...
"derrin_goh85" derrin_goh85@yahoo.com

Re: [BC_LM] Please dun confuse us all ok??? Change d title of bj coursework file....
"BC_LM" stand for Broadcast Last Minute... Nothingconfuse...
gan lim

Re: Please dun confuse us all ok??? Change d title of bj coursework file....
i'm not talking abt d title!!can u open ur eyes n seee???CHANGE D TITLE OF BJ COURSEWORK FILE!
"derrin_goh85" derrin_goh85@yahoo.com

something to say...
sorry to say...
the file was post at BC_LM...so definitely for BC Tutorial 1...
if the result is for whole BCY3S3, of coz will post at BC Y3
grace ring

Re: something to say...
Before surffing any page or site on the Internet please check whichthat you are surffing... enter to the right site.BC_LM is obviously for T1.. of course only consist of T1 stuff...nothing less...We welcome other people to visit but please be clear what you arecommenting...
"limpikgan"

Re: something to say...
Although BC_LM is for T1 only...but...the front page does not statethat it is only for T1 students only. This can somehow create aconfusion for the other tutorial group...moreover, if it is a privateforum, then I dunno why we are not entitled to access this forum. Weare a team, a pioneer team, unless we segregate each other likeenemies, then why not share what we have? It is an era of freedom of information and speech, thus we should be sharing out our information.If i do offend any of your T1 compadres, then i offer my deepest and utmost apologies.Thank You Very Much.Only my 2 cents worth.
"derrin_goh85" derrin_goh85@yahoo.com

2 cents apologizes?? only.... cents
this is the last thing i want to say:sometime we open our house for others to visit,and welcome them tovisit anytime, but does not mean the "guest" has the right to commentthe house whether the house is comfortable to him / her ... and we donot need to state clearly that the house belongs to "us", and we havethe right to put any colour to our house. so, i think the page ownerdoes not need to state clearly this page is for t1, even she welcomeother people to visit.also, i do welcome comment from others but manners do matter. by theway, friends from t1 stop me to comment again... so i think i shouldRESPECT them, because this page belongs to them too!
"limpikgan"

Re: something to say...
the better way to stop be enemy is shut ur mouth up at the right time.whats wrong with u? if so dissatisfy then just get away la from thisforum le. don take for granted n think someone have to prepareeverything here for anyone. learn to be appreciate since u never putany effort here to benefit anyone so long.so, don try to say wat shareanything we got and bla bla bla all nonsense. why have to create suchambiance here? third year last sem, as u know, we do have a goodrelationship with other tutorial group so far. so don try to playsb.off against each other。 thank u very much too !
"tracytanleehwa"

stop fighting~be peace
ya...i agree~~save the time to male frens better than this.DO REMEMBER:don't rely on others to give u anything...
"wong jing xiao"

What I didn't know was that it was 'meant' for a tutorial group...stupid me...but I dunno why my friends have this forum address. Turns out that it was given to her by a friend who invited us to go there.

BC@LM is for all of us
please... stop fighting, ==+though this group was for T1 when firstly created, its belong to all of us since i invited T2 and T3's friends to join and changed its front page picture to the current 1. if this changes make anyone of you unhappy please forgive me, i apologize. we all are classmates, why can't we share things that we have here? however also we all are gonna graduate very the soon, its no point to fighting to each other...
"tengx1018"

So I am really stupid. Stupid to fall in this trap...stupid to be me.
I am really dumb to act that it is a happy family forum.
Now most people will think that I am a troublemaker, after what I have changed to defend myself.

This is all too idealistic to me. Maybe I should know the cruel world.

Stupid Me.

SLR....where art thou...?

2007-12-08T20:13:00.000+08:00

See these two pictures? This is my friend Helen. To tell you the truth, she's not that attractive (please don't kill me), but what makes her much nicer? These two photos of course. Do they reek of professionalism? (no.) Do they look like they are shot by a professional photographer? (erm..)

THESE TWO PHOTOS ARE SHOT BY.....

BY....

BY....ME.

YES. ME. YOURS TRULY.

It is no doubt that my camera is the magical wand.

Nikon D40x. What wonders does it make?

For once, it makes people bearable. (woot!)

And, it exudes professionalism-lar....

God...when can I get a SLR???

Be Enchanted!

2007-12-05T22:03:00.000+08:00

Last week I went to watch the most anticipated movie, 'Enchanted'.
Now, some of you might think that this is some sappy and childish Disney flick, conning parents and kids to the cinemas, but I can assure you...
IT IS A BIG FAT NOOOOOOOOOO!! I fell completely in love with it!! SOOOO DAMN NICE!!!!!!

The story goes like this: A princess (Amy Adams) in the fairy tale kingdom of Andalasia was gonna get married to her true love, Prince Edward (James Marsden). Alas, the Queen (of course the bad one lah) tricked Giselle into making a wish at a wishing well. The ‘jahat’ Queen (Susan Sarandon) pushed Giselle into the well and voila! She appears in the real world (through a 5th Avenue manhole!). She is freaked out by the unfriendly real world, yet she meets a divorce lawyer Robert (Patrick ‘McDreamy’ Dempsey). He helps her out, yet feels she is too weird (she hor, cuts fabric out of curtains to make dresses and also ask rodents and pigeons to help her clean up the house!!!YUCK!) Eventually they fall for each other. But Prince Edward is also looking for her, as well as the evil Queen and her aide, Nathaniel (Tim Spall). Then, how will they fight through to defeat the Queen? Will Giselle follow Robert or Edward? That’s for you to find out! (Please, don’t buy pirated VCD, DVD, or download!)

What attracts me to watch it? I’m sure all of us would have watch one or two Disney Princess series right? Well, this is a spoof of ALL the Disney Princess series, yet making it more enjoyable. PLUS, the songs are so damn nice! I was told that the songs are sampled from the other Disney songs, but I don’t feel like that lor! The song that I love is a song from Jon Mclaughlin called ‘So Close’. It is so romantic, yet the lyrics is sad. When your love is close to you, yet you can’t love him or her, it is the worst thing ever. Just like the Chinese saying, the farthest thing in the world is I’m standing in front of you, yet you don’t know that I love you…*swoon*..

Character wise, it boasts of cool and good actors, from Amy Adams (love her from Catch Me if You Can), James Marsden (versatile from X-Men to Hairspray???!!), and of course McDreamy himself, Patrick Dempsey. Susan Sarandon is wonderfully evil as The Queen.

With so many good things in this movie, do you dare say you don’t feel like watching??
I LOVE ENCHANTED!!

My All Time Best Male Chinese Composers

2007-11-17T17:18:00.000+08:00

Sorry ler...I keep looking for female chinese composers that I like, but can't find anyone that I think deserves to be in the list. Stefanie Sun, although I know she does some of her songs, but I think she is at her best when she sings Lee brothers' songs.

So here they are, my choice of top male chinese composers:

Most sensitive lyricist, I presume...

7. Kenji Wu

Famous for hits like 吴克群，我的罪，大舌头，将军领，不屑纪念，残废，etc. In my opinion, his voice doesn't seem to be the best, but he has the ability to hit the right feel in his lyrics. I love those sappy songs that he wrote, and the lyrics to his songs has been able to make my friends cry. Originally he was an actor, yet he flopped in the late 90s. Came back as a composing singer, and reclaimed the Chinese music industry. Haven't seen him these few days, except for that time he was romantically linked to SHE's Ella (how dare you!). Nominated for Best Male Singer in several Golden Melody Awards, but didn't get it. Maybe he should try for Best Lyricist instead?

Man with the goofy grin, but powerful voice.

6. Gary Chau

Famous for hits like Superwoman，Superman，背叛，烛光晚餐，两只恋人，etc. He was initially a finalist in Malaysia's Talent Quest, but after an album in Malaysia, he went AWOL. Apparently he left and went to Taiwan to seek his fortune. Suddenly, an album in Taiwan made him the most sought after male composer among the top composers in town. Soon, every artiste in Taiwan had his songs. Thanks to Michael Wong 光良, he became a household name. Also nominated for Best Male Singer in GMA, has yet to beat the top men in Taiwan. With a buff bod and a powerful voice, it is no wonder that Gary is still the BOMB for me.

I ain't going anywhere without a hat!

5. Justin Lo

Hong Kong's answer to Jay Chou and David Tao. Famous for hits like 命硬，Volar，情歌，Erica，Kong，etc. He does most of his songs in RnB and hip-hop style. Nowadays, he's become mellow and meddled in jazz and soul. Initially a back-up singer, his talents were discovered and helped most Hong Kong singers by writing popular songs. Clients include Leo Ku, Miriam Yeung, etc. Even Leo Ku's career was revived by his song 大雄！He's got the most consistent singing amongst the newer generation of HK artiste, and he has won mumerous accolades in HK and China. The other catch is, he's short, and becoming bald. Heard that he has a bald spot on top, which is why he wear hats, caps, and anything to cover his head. Other than that, he's cool. 'Nuff said.

Sarangheyo! I'm cute yet manly!

4. JJ Lin

Singapore's answer to all the composers in Taiwan and HK. I think the best import to come out from SG since Stefanie Sun and Tanya Chua (have I left out anyone?). Famous for hits like 江南，冻结，翅膀，杀手，木乃伊，etc. He started by writing a song called 记得 to the then-famous A-Mei, and the song became a hit in KTVs. After a few albums, he became famous after composin and singing a song about a part of China called 江南，thus cementing his stardom in China and Taiwan. Won the Best Newcomer in the GMAs, but hasn't been cursed by the award itself (apparently who wins the prize will suffer bad career in the next album). Has a cute dimpled smile, but quite muscular indeed. Recently became slimmer and less muscly (bah!). Romantically linked to a girl called Yumi.

Don't write me off just yet, I'm still the Music Maestro!

3. David Tao

Initially the King of Chinese Music Industry, but since has been dethroned by the other two younger compatriots. But still, he still has the touch of the Music Maestro. Famous hits include 爱很简单，普通朋友，黑色柳丁，寂寞的季节，孙子兵法，太美丽，etc. He has scores of songs that almost are a classic to this day. I have always decribed his music as "a smooth flowing river", as his songs mainly comprises of RnB and rock. He has often seen snubbing the GMAs, and yet to win one, I think (correct me if I'm wrong). Often romantically linked to very very sophisticated women, or women that are outside the music industry. One of the exes is Melody, a ex-beauty pageant queen, who has become very popular after David Tao immortalized her in the song "Melody". Recently became very very buff, and he has shed tons of weight since his 普通朋友days.

I'm talented and good looking. Now I want to save the world!

2. Leehom Wang

2nd best in my list. Since David Tao hasn't got any new material, so he settles in at No.3. Leehom Wang, only 30 years old, yet he has been in the industry for 10 years! A music prodigy in the States, he has transformed to a non-Mandarin speaking 'banana' to a Cantonese, Mandarin, Japanese-speaking multi-tasking artiste! Famous hits include 唯一，爱的就是你，WHY，花田错，心中的日月，落叶归根，etc. Very good looking and hasn't quite aged, in his MV for 爱错，he trained hard to portray a boxer. Nowadays, he has transformed into a world-class actor and is seen in Ang Lee's "Lust, Caution". Leehom pledged to "save the world" by using recycled materials to produce his album covers. Romatically linked to an array of women from Shu Qi, Selina, and A-Mei (erp!). Good looking, talented and friendly. What more can you complain about? Oh, he's sloppy and messy if he's busy doing music. But we can overlook that.

AND THE TOP VOTE GOES TO....

I juggle between singing, acting, doing business, and...erm...anything lah...

1. Jay Chou

The man of the decade! Famous hits are uncountable, from 黑色幽默，开不了口，最后的战役，以父之名，晴天，夜曲，千里之外，牛仔很忙，etc. God, his songs are almost 200 of 'em, not counting those he had written for other singers! A 鬼才 (prodigy) in his era, he dabbles from composing, singing and now he has crossed his boundaries to the movie industry. From Initial D to the recent Secret, he started off as an actor, right until he starts to direct his own MVs, and even a movie of his own! I used to laugh at his MVs, but since he directed the simple yet oh-so straight to the heart 'Secret', I began to respect him, even to the point that I salute my ass off to him! In his new album, he stunned us with a cheesy Western song. But when you get the hang of it, you will hum to its chorus in an instant. Unlike David Tao's songs that are easily accepted when you 1st heard it, Jay's songs are like wine, or beer, the 1st sip is always the worst, but after a few sips you get the hang of it, and you are forever addicted to it. He is the main focus of the paparazzi, where he is often caught canoodling with different women. Romantically linked to so so so so many women, from female leads in his MVs, to Jolin Tsai, rumoured to be his famous exes, Landy Wen, Patty Ho (the only one he has admitted to be dating), Hebe, etc. He lives in his own world, but when creative juices come flowing, no one can stop him from doing what he does best, singing. He is on top of the world right now.

That concludes my choice of best Chinese male composers. Keep looking for more choice lists of mine!

Bogged? Blogged? Nosey Parkers?

2007-11-11T13:07:00.000+08:00

Uncle Nosey Parker

Well,I'm really starting to feel sad for it.

It's not that I don't love you,

I really do.

It's hard for us to move forward.

It's not you. And it isn't me either.

It's just them.

I've been writing blogs since a year and more, and it has been a channel to express myself.

So far, it hasn't been a big problem for me, even there were supportive comments and positive reviews.

Recently, i've been bogged by negative and angry comments by people I have respected and known. Was it something that I had thought and wanted to express my feelings angered them?

BUT WHOSE BLOG IS THIS? YOURS? MINE? OR THEIRS?

It's saddening to see, not only my blog being bombarded by visitors who only took a glimpse of my blog, didn't even bother to check out my other entries, and went straight to ONLY ONE of my entries, giving comments that didn't even have a connection to my entry.......*rolls eyes*

I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THAT IT DOESN'T HAPPEN ONLY TO THIS BLOG, MY FAITHFUL CHINESE BLOG ALSO HAPPENED THE SAME THING...

You see bloggers like Xiaxue, Kenny Sia, Steven Lim.

You see people shooting these people down, but the bloggers stood right up just to shoot them down.

I would always have a thought of 'what ifs', 'if onlys', 'whys', just to make people understand how I feel.

I thank my brother, even though we were not that close, he stuck with me and gave his two cents' worth. I love my brother because of this.

He told me that freedom of speech is what you have. Do not be afraid of them.

I couldn't help but agree. Why putting on a fake mask when you are in your own blog?

If only blogging were only a channel of expressing myself, but Nosey Parkers lurk among our midst to stoke fire amongst people whom I have known, respected, think that they are 'civilised' enough to think that these are only mere expressions in my head and soul.

I thanks youse all for reading my blog, but please remember that if I had read your blog, your diary, would you feel offended? Would I tell others? Would I feel somehow reserved to talk and befriend you? Would you think that why that this person would think so of you?

Think. And not just be a Nosey Parker. And please, these are my reserved thoughts. Even if you are offended, there is always something that make someone think so of you.

I wouldn't think of removing this blog, as this is a diary of my heart and soul.

You can diss me, but there is always a mirror in a person's heart.

And think, who is amongst us that stokes this unwanted fire?

OKTOBERFEST...My Mug of Beer!

2007-11-05T23:23:00.000+08:00

OktoberFest....one of the most intriguing festivals that I would like to visit overseas! But luckily , 1 Utama has brought this great festival right to us! So, 1 Utama, I LOVE YOU!!! HAHAHA....

That day, we went to cover the events there as we had a broadcast journalism assignment। But we were also enjoying the food and of course, the beer lah...heehee....*hic*...

My Warsteiner Beer....very cooling and not that bitter....too bad I can't drink much...bah...

Great music by The German Singing Group, complete with red faces...*hic*....

Neways, I'll just post some of the pics soon....my comp getting abit emo liao....hahaz...

Everything That's 5 About Me

2007-10-24T23:09:00.000+08:00

I found this in a lot of blogs, so I decided to post it meself.

5 things found in my room:
1) IKEA cupboards and drawers (nice!)
2) Memorabilia
3) Magazines (I have entire collection of epop magazines!)
4) A bed that looks like a maid's bed
5) Termite container (my room infested with termites...bcoz of IKEA)

5 things I’ve always wanted to do:
1) Clean my room and house
2) Earn money!
3) Find time to sleep
4) Shoot a music video, indie film, short film, commercial, etc.
5) Travel to nice places (like Europe, Australia, Taiwan, Japan....)

5 things found in my bag:
1) Notes
2) Mobile phone
3) MP3
4) I don't know what else
5) Rubbish gua....

5 things found in my wallet:
1) Hideous MyKad and Driving license (looks like I had a bad day when I took it)
2) Money...what else?
3) Ang Kong Hoo (talismanic stuff, I'm terrified of bad luck and you-know-whats)
4) My trusted Bank Card (ATM)
5) Various cards that I might not give a hoot

5 things I’m currently into:
1) Blogging
2) Reading other people's blog
3) Sleep
4) Eating nice food!
5) Cure my cough, gastric, etc...

Bored and Sick! Sod It!

2007-10-15T17:38:00.000+08:00

Cut my hair to amuse myself, failed naturally.

So bored lah!!
And am sick since friday, so here I am, wasting a pretty holiday by cooking instant duck, and a tin of luncheon meat for lunch! (sick liao kena eat this crap again)

Actually I am very pissed off.
I have beeen blogging in my chinese blog about thing that pisses me off, yet no one cares a bit. Oh well, people would think I'm a nutase anyway, which explains that my friends are shying away from me!!! ( sue me)

I hate those people that thinks they know everything, and they love to give their opinion like it is a decree to them ( OH HAIL PPL, I THINK THAT WE SHOULD GO XXX TO DO XXX). You know what, too many people in a gang is sure going to be T.R.O.U.B.L.E. I know that each people need to have their own opinion and stuff, they can choose who to follow, but when a friend who is already a good friend of you since college, suddenly turns and forms a gang with other friends, you feel left out, or feel betrayed. You would think WTF! That person has the choice! Well, how would you feel if you have a friend, and suddenly POOF! That friend goes and do stuff that you used to do with them!

Simple stuff like asking to car pool.
I asked nicely: Do you wan me to fetch u?
Then came a reply: No lah...I promised xxx to car pool edi.
WTF!!!!!
Cannot tell me until I ask izit!

Mum says I don't need to bother about these people, they don't know how to appreciate.
But, being a goody-two-shoes, I coulndn't help but ask and act like nothing happened.
Fack those people who talk behing people's backs, then act like buddy buddy and all that.
I know I do kepoh, but to bad mouth people like nobody's business?!
Who the hell are you wor??

Then comes those who think themselves as people who cannot see themselves shutting their mouth up. When you talk about people, when you ask people, do you think whether the question is irritating or sensitive? Then when people talk about you, you feel damn pissed. Chiu....

Anyway, an idle mind is a wandering mind...so this is only my feelings. Anyone who feels that I'm talking about them, well, too bad lah. You categorized yourself into these people. Who told you to think like them, eh?

Feeling awfully angry. Might as well shun away from everyone. Fack meself.

P.S. Please read the bold words before feeling pissed.

How long can you?

2007-10-15T00:15:00.000+08:00

Ehem...i have to be frank here, I''m NOT in a relationship, nor do I harbour any good feelings towards any male species around me!!

Recently, I have heard some stories that couples are starting to fall out of love, or wanting to break-up cuz they are either sick or fed-up of each other. So I'm here to give my two-cents worth.

So, how do you measure love?
By how long izit? Or how deep? (cue How deep is your love~~~~)
Actually, I dunno, it's just that people are so fast-moving that even relationships are like fast food: you eat fast-fast, then habis dah, u buang aje..

Neways, my friend suggests that these people might have been going through a rough patch. They should concentrate in making their realtionship, you know, reignite their love?

Aih...I'm abit bored about this topic liao (now am hangat hangat tahi ayam), so anyone wanna comment?

!Gasp! My ex-classmate is actually a flogger!

2007-10-12T18:37:00.000+08:00

*shock*
Today, or actually just now, i was looking and looking at those flogs (food blogs), and since these 2 days i was browsing at a flog called "KampungBoyCityGal"..
And then......

I saw the name of the CityGal....
It was actually my ex-classmate from AMC,Ipoh!
*shock*!

Pai-seh lah me liao....I still have a long way to go to make my mark in the blogging line....

Neways,
Wei Zhi, congrats on your flog!
And hope you guys are happy together!

Check out their website at: http://kampungboycitygal.blogspot.com

I don't mean to complain and whine, but....

2007-10-10T16:20:00.000+08:00

Just only my 2nd post here, but I'm already starting to post angry (or whiny) stuff here...
Well, here goes...

Now it's already October, so here I am, in my final semester.
Well, I had to start my classes a week earlier than other coursemates, 'cause we had a LAN subject to study. This is already a bad sign that we're gonna get some rough waters this semester.

And....we started our Pendidikan Moral class this Monday.
Boy we were in for a bad day.
The teacher, our 'lecturer', looked okay at first, but when he started his lecture, aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrgggghhhh!!!!!!

HE WAS TEACHING US LIKE KINDERGARTEN KIDS!!!

Then...we had to endure 4 and 1/2 hrs of terrible teachings (coz some of the stuff we had already learnt during media ethics), and also his penchant of talking (or yapping) when we were busy copying and doing his so-called 'activities'.

The junior weren't so helpful either. They were busy 'connecting' with the lecturer, thus creating more noise. So damn headache-lah!!!!

Anyway, the worse part is our timetable for this semester.
I dunno whether the faculty have a grudge on us, or we are the guinea pigs,
they deliberately did TWO timetables for us, one for week 1,3,5,7 and another for week 2,4,6.
And,
They made us go for Saturday classes until 2.30pm!!
WTF!

So here goes my bi-weekly trip back to Ipoh...
I don't mean to think my uni is a crap place, but seeing all this things, I must admit they are inefficient...

I HATE MY UNI!!

My first ever post in this blog! Hurrah!

2007-09-17T22:52:00.000+08:00

Oh oh oh....or hohoho?

This is my first english blog, so lots of grammars and typo errors will be appearing from time to time lah...

Been trying to start an English blog just to improve my English abit...hope it works.
Btw, can this blog support Chinese?
If yes, then maybe I will slowly kena divert to Chinese liao....ceh...

If you guys wanna check out my Chinese blog, it's at www.wretch.cc/blog/wenxuan85

Enjoy! Ta!